Saturday, November 27, 2010

Thanksgiving was an interesting day. Mom ruined the stuffing by laying out the bread on Downy soaked kitchen towels. The strong scent and taste of fabric softener permeated the entire stuffing and after just one bite, my appetite was destroyed and the dinner was a total bust. The bright side is that I ate way less than I normally would and saved a ton of calories.

One of my best friends went home for the holiday. She enjoyed a festive 50 person Thanksgiving! Wow, I'm so envious of that. Since I've lived on the west coast and most of my family is on the east coast, my holidays tend to be a meager gathering of orphaned friends and my mother.

My best guy friend told me that his family experienced a bit of drama when his grandmother left in a huff because her dog wasn't allowed to roam freely throughout the house. His parents just got new furniture so his mother set up an area for the little dog to hang out but the dog was miserable, hence so was his grandmother, so they made an early angry exit.

Now, my friends are planning Christmas. Who knows where we'll end up or how many there will actually be. Holidays are a tricky affair and never seem to go as planned whether they are had in the usual places or during a trip.

The Christmas after my dad died, mom and I decided to go to Vegas (of all places) for Christmas. We wanted to be as far away from tradition as we possibly could. That plan was foiled when every hotel was gilded in gold and decorated with towering trees, lit up for all to see. Families were there with generations following in toe. We were faced with our reality of spending the holiday, just the two of us, alone in Vegas. We vowed never to do that again!

This year was filled with many, many changes. Old and new relationships rekindled, a few false starts and one delicately balanced in the process of ending, most likely. It is always my intention to tie up the end of the year and evaluate any served purposes. I like to start the new year fresh. No sense in dragging along a corpse (or two) into a new beginning. Besides, you can't move very fast when carrying the dead.

My cousins are facing the painful and inevitable loss of their father who's been battling cancer for a couple of years. First it was bladder cancer, then lung. Now my uncle Bob has a brain tumor and the doctors have officially given him 2 months to live. My heart aches over his suffering and the sad process of letting him go. I curse this world when the inescapable sorrow beats relentlessly at the door. It is out of our control.

His cancer brought their family back together again, which was a great, unexpected by-product of such a horrible situation. I just hope their strength can withstand the next agonizing weeks as they watch him deteriorate slowly. My whole being cries for them today.